Make Bunkers Great Again

Make Bunkers Great Again


Trump keeps his penis

where his heart should be


so when he stands

during the National Anthem

he palms his own genitals


His obedient catchphrase regurgitating followers

should be horrified,

for falling in line behind a TV show guy

who picks fights with Democratic Nations

while praising Oligarchs and Dictators


embraces the same political beliefs

as organized white supremacists

A guy who treats the truth like a desperate


and is capable only of discussing every goddamn thing

in the world he ever talks about in terms of

greatest or worst

as if everything in between didn’t exist

and uses the bible on people who believe

in those things to justify

internment camps, legitimize racism,

and defend Putin’s misinformation plot

to bring down America and the EU


[Historical Note:] Putin’s winning now, bigly

(Putin’s winning so much, he’s tired of winning)

and Trump’s followers should feel horrible

about following the kind of guy

that would allow this to happen for the sake of narcissism,


the kind of guy

who would do all these things

while palming his own penis

at The American Flag



Fucking people,


Knock it off already, stop bending over

in all the wrong ways for that dude



That slush show of historical throat chops

(save us, Liam Neeson-lingus!)

This goddamned reality

overpopulated w/ chumps


and stop asking me what my plans are for the day

at the weed store

when I’m standing at the counter trying like hell

to hold everything together


I’m at the weed store before 10:00 in the morning

and the world’s crumbling towards a self inflicted destruction

I just want to grab a couple grams of shake

and get the hell out of there


That’s as far as my broken heart’s capable of planning

Why they gotta go and ask me what I’m planning on doing for the rest of the day?!

Do they really give a shit? No. It’s just something they automatically say to everyone

who walks up to any counter

It’s pre programmed banter, they’re following the corporate script book

Well, don’t try to pull me in there, because I ain’t gonna go


That kind of chit chat

that’s the kind of chit chat

that leads to madness


Do they really want to know how I actually plan on spending the rest of my Saturday?

They don’t. I know this. Because a couple of times I actually told them

I’m going to go home, smoke this, and spend the next 36 hours

sitting on my futon reading The Death of Democracy and The Idiot,

fight off a couple of panic attacks, debate quietly with myself

about whether or not it’s worth masturbating, eat a bunch of spinach dip,

watch 10 episodes of The Six Million Dollar Man,

and scribble things down in my notebook

until I pass out


I say these things, and

Fuck me,

because they’re horrified


Nobody wants to hear an answer like this

Not in the just-follow-the-script atmosphere

of the customer/employee counter top conversation environment


I’m a hermit, goddamn it

Don’t ask me about my plans

I stockpile Bela Lugosi movies

and buy my Moleskin notebooks

in bulk


I’m supposed to say: What am I doing? I’m going to

take a cake decorating class at the Y, have brunch at

the brunch store with an old college friend, and then meet up

with my fellow Bungy Jumping Club members

because we’re going to bungy jump off some goddamn thing

or maybe I’m going to a bbq or a bbq’s coming to me

or any goddamn thing that has anything to do

with being present somewhere with a bbq


So there!

Does that make you happy?!


That’s the shit the script dictates we do

That’s what they expect you to say

You’re going to a bbq? Awesome.

My sister’s going to a bbq. All right.

We must be the same”

They love that


When you tell them you’re going to go home and

spend the rest of the day feeling bad about stuff

they make a face like you’ve just ruined everything

like you’ve just taken a really awkward shit

in their dad’s swimming pool

in front of their mom


(and their parent’s marriage up until this point

was always shaky at best)


so FUCK, that’s not my fault

and I swear I’m not ‘trying’ to be an asshole

just don’t ask me if I’ve got ‘big plans’

for the rest of the day

How is anyone supposed to answer a loaded question

like that?


The future is a history book starring the rise

of a brand new Hitler

and I’m mourning the old days

when everything felt like Brautigan

and if this is the end of the world

I’m gonna need a hat like Heston walks around wearing

in Soylent Green

and a cane like the one Lon Chaney Jr.

picked up at the cane store in The Wolfman


If this is the end of the world

I’m gonna need a magic duffle bag

that’ll hold all my notebooks, my action figures,

the library, my dvd’s, a couple of guitars,

Steve Marin’s thermos, every memory ever made…..

and a solid bunker within underground

walking distance

to your bunker




Everything ends:

Tv shows


you being naked


and when all that happens

when everythings ending

we’re hard wired to jump into

the immediate protocol of survival


We retreat to our designated bunkers

our species last resort


so that’s what I do

I’ve been down here for a long while now

It’s lonely and it smells like whiskey,

damp comic books, and fabreezed spam



It’s ruthless, this life, and

of course we fight

but most times we lose, and after all that losing

We all retreat inside our own bunkers



Which is bullshit, because


What’s the point

of having a bunker

if I can’t share that bunker

with you

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